Monday, December 11, 2006

LotR: 20 Lines To Overrule Them All

Oh, it's time for some humor. Hat tip to John C. Wright
for the link to 20 Lines That Could Have Dramatically Changed The Lord of the Rings

For the more sensitive, there is some foul language. Ye've been warned, sojourner.

Now, for some Tolkien-gone-wrong tidbits:

Sauron: “I know it’s preposterous, Witch-King. But we’ve got more than enough orcs here to wipe out Gondor. Post a thousand Uruk-hai by the lava pit on Mount Doom, just in case. Humor me.”

Gandalf: “Before you decide whether we should go through the Mines of Moria, Frodo, I should warn you that there’s a 30-foot-tall flame-spewing demon servant of the ancient god Morgoth hanging out down there. Just thought you’d want to know that.”

Arwen: “Let me see… Another forty years with the man I love, or the rest of eternity frolicking with all my friends and family in a deathless land with the gods right next door. When you put it that way, it’s really not much of a decision, is it? Besides, Aragorn’s already got Eowyn, and I’ve got my sub love slave Figwit.”

2 comments:

Josh said...

Hah! Great find, Mir. Makes you wonder things like...what if Lucy hid in the cupboard instead of the wardrobe?

Mirtika said...

She'd have found the cupboard was bare and so the poor dog had none?

Mir