Sunday, December 31, 2006

Dekker's THR3E Hits Theaters January 5

I wasn't that wowed by the trailer, and I normally don't bother going to the movie theater unless the film just grabs me by my recalcitrant neck and drags me yonder. For instance, Russell Crowe in peak alpha maleness in Gladiator. I went to that one TWICE. Went to The Matrix and Speed and some others twice, too. Saw Excalibur and Raiders of the Lost Ark each about five times way back when.

Why do I avoid theaters? I loathe the smell of theaters and the rude and noisy patrons who seem to always sit BEHIND ME with their will-not-shut-up-or-stop-fidgeting-or-kicking kinder. And the super-ear-damaging volume. And did I mention the smell? My freakishly malfunctioning immune system and respiratory system just don't do well in cold, mildewy theaters.

I think the last time I went to see a film in a theater was...was...

I can't even remember.

Hang on. I recall now. That Shark Boy and Lava Girl thing, and it was cause my grandniece wanted to see it. Yeah. That was my last theater excursion.

I plan to make the ultimate sinus sacrifice (the mildew, oh, the mildew!) to go see Pan's Labyrinth (scroll to post below). I do not plan to inflame my mucosal lining for THR3E, though I hope it's good enough to get some decent reviews that will get Christian folk (and others) out to see and support it.

Yeah, I want to keep sending the message to Hollywood that Christians are a legit audience that ought not be neglected.

Note: I'm a legit DVD-buying part of the audience to make up for the not-going-to-movies part.

I bought The Passion of the Christ and have yet to remove the plastic wrap. I know, just KNOW, that I'm gonna bawl myself into a serious asthmatic episode. I get that way just meditating on the passion--all weepy and mournful. If I had to SEE it, I'd be hysterical. It took me a couple weeks to get back to normal after seeing Schindler's List. I haven't been able to watch it again. I totally refuse to see Saving Private Ryan for the same reason. I'll become respiratorily messed up from the upset.

Historical Moment: When I was, what, eleven or so, I begged my mom to take me to see Nicholas & Alexandra. I had read the fictionalized story of the last tsar and I wanted to see the film. Oh, big mistake. I got home all wet-faced and threw myself on the carpet every day for like a week crying over their shooting the children. (I was a little less upset about the tsar and tsarina, but I was just aghast that they killed the young ones.) Burnt orange carpet. My face in it. Howling.

I'm sensitive about some things.

My husband is used to passing me tissues when I watch shows that are heartwarming or tragic. I'm easily brought to tears.

So, no. I don't do well with uber-heartbreaking films, especially if they are related in any way to truth (ie, real people got massacred or tortured or falsely accused or whatever). I get sick. So, I keep putting off seeing Mel's opus. I still bought the dvd.

I also bought--in my support "my people" dvd buying groove--the Narnia dvd and Signs. (Yawn.) I bought the The Exorcism of Emily Rose dvd to support Christian film-making. (Not bad, actually. Very scary barn scene.

So, if you like suspense, or if you're a Dekker fan, or if you just want to send that "I'm a Christian, hear me roar at the box office" message to the PTB in LaLaLand, buy your ticket opening weekend. Make Ted smile.

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